Overcoming fear to follow your hearts desires and your deepest wishes is the hardest part because until you do, you stay stuck. Fear can hold people back for years and even for someone’s whole life where their dreams never become realized, only to be taken to the grave. Fear dictates our lives in most cases, our decisions and our actions.
“Fear defeats more people than any other one thing in the world.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
Why do only a few people ever reach their goals?
One reason is FEAR. This is also one of the reason you will probably never even get started on making your dreams come true, creating new ideas, unleashing your passion into something you truly love or just being you.
Overcoming the fear of criticism – How to be authentic.
If you rely on getting anywhere in life based on the opinions of others, always ‘scared’ about what they will think of you, then you are not living authentically. This was me. Always pleasing other people giving them power, paranoid at what they might say, doing the ‘right’ thing to keep them happy. This was a big mistake, until I realized those people you try to keep happy have power over you. I realized you can’t please everybody. Ever. You have to do what is right for you even if it means going against the crowd. To find out who you are, find your Happy Triggers.
4 ways to eliminate your fear so you can move forward in life
- Work on yourself first. Discover who you are, discover your purpose by finding your – Happy Triggers this will give you confidence going forward as you become certain about what you are about and what you want in life.
- Think positive thoughts. Whenever a situation arises that has you thinking the worst, change your thoughts to thinking about all the good things that can happen. If your stuck taking the first step towards your goals think about the positive things that can happen if you did.
- Live in the present – when you are in the moment, there is nothing to fear. You only fear something that in the future most of the time. Focusing on the present moment in your current situation allows you to just be with nothing to worry about.
- Confront fear by doing the very thing you are afraid to do. Thinking about it is more painful than doing it because you will create scenarios in your mind that are not even true!
What If I told your fear doesn’t exist… only in the mind “yes OK that makes sense” you say. But what’s happening is you are creating stories of how things may turn out, the way in which you don’t want them to. The only thing is it hasn’t happened yet.
Fear is a warning mechanism trying to help you from stepping into the unknown, this dates back to instincts and survival so we could act in a way that would keep us alive if ever we came under attack (think caveman days). Fear came in useful then so we could react effectively.
How to overcome all your fears for good
- What’s the biggest fear you have right now?
Write this down. (It could be a goal you have or task you should be doing)
- Now begin to write down all the negative thoughts you have that is stopping you from doing this.
e.g. “I should be doing the housework instead” “I will never be able to afford it” “it won’t work out for me” “People will think I’m crazy”
- For each negative statement ask yourself – is it true?
Put a yes or no and why. Most answers will not be true.
- Now create your ‘truth’ mantra
What’s true for you?
Examples: “It is my calling to help other people all over the world” or “I am going to be fit and healthy because that is who I am” or “my purpose is to be a leader”
Now you have your truth mantra anytime you have any worry or doubt use it to remind yourself why you are doing what you do. You can also do this each day during a meditation or quiet time spending one minute focusing on your mantra.
Fear should not be the reason you don’t do something you really want to do, fight the fear become fearless and feel the fear and do it anyway. It won’t be easy at first but now you are aware of what to do when fear shows up. Don’t give in, get past it and begin to live before its too late.